Hello everyone! Apologize for being away for too long. I myself also didn't realize that I've been MIA for almost half year. My last post was on March!
In the past 6 months (and up til today), my time, energy and mind were very occupied. To free up some space in my brilliant mind, I decided to go back to this beloved blog and type down this post. Not a travelling post (while I should be posting about my last trip to Japan!), but a personal post. This post will be very subjective as I will briefly share my two cents about the etiquette in criticizing others. I only want to make it as a reminder for myself (and hopefully for you too if we're on the same page). If you feel like you will not enjoy this kind of post, please scroll through my other post in this blog as I have a lot for you to enjoy!
If you’re in, let me start by summing up my life in the past 6 months before I start my mumble.
So 6 months ago, I landed to a new work position. Remember back then to my internship days, I saw some staff stay until late at the office and I told myself I won't fancy overtime work... but here I am now spending fifty percent of the precious 24 hrs a day making calls and scrolling through Excel files at the office lol. I think it's normal though to be overwhelmed with new responsibility that we don't have before. Surely by keep on progressing to the better, it will be only matter of time until we cope up, catch up, and be friend with new responsibility.
Then to ensure I stay sane, I wanted to prepare my own meal (just so I can cook; one of my deepest passion) and go on proper workouts (just so I can fit into my uniform). Yet to find time to do that is another challenge, so I need to go the extra mile to achieve that. I decided to sleep 1-2 hours less to wake up early to chop my carrots in the morning before go for work and go home a bit later so I can run my 5K on the treadmill after work.
Adulthood is really about trying to balance out and be excel with every aspect of life, isn't it? Big applause and pat on the back to every adult out there because we all know it's not an easy task. I never say I enjoy waking up super early in the morning and going home pretty late; but if that's the sacrifice that I need to take to get what I want, there's no other way to do that.
Then as if the struggle within myself is not enough, people try to ignite fire by throwing opinions and comments. One of the recent comments that I heard a lot and repetitively, directed to anything that I do is:
Then as if the struggle within myself is not enough, people try to ignite fire by throwing opinions and comments. One of the recent comments that I heard a lot and repetitively, directed to anything that I do is:
"You're trying too hard."
Actually there's nothing wrong with the you-are-trying-too-hard statement. It shows that people pay attention to us and they have the vision that something can be improved from our current situation. It only becomes wrong when people throw that opinion and just left it hanging.
What's the purpose of saying “you’re trying too hard” if we can't offer options to ease out other's life? Without us emphasizing, they might already aware of the situation and been fighting battles in their mind, struggling to find ways to escape from their current circumstances. Us being so nosy and recklessly throwing comments without any solid solution will do them no good. It will just create more burden to their mind.
Whenever people starts to criticize me, I actually wait and anticipate for their next sentences, hoping they continue with some ideas, even the silly but rationale one, to make me stop trying hard. However, most of the times they just stop. Leaving me questioning myself, questioning my effort, questioning everything... and it could kill the fire and confidence that I previously had.
So I guess, unless we have better alternative that might help others to stop 'trying too hard', or some constructive critiques with solid reasoning and feedback, or at the very least some points of discussion worth to mention, I think it is much wiser to just keep the urge to preach to ourself.
Because we know people are already trying hard. You're already trying super hard. I'm also already trying so hard.
Let's not make it any harder for everyone 😉
What's the purpose of saying “you’re trying too hard” if we can't offer options to ease out other's life? Without us emphasizing, they might already aware of the situation and been fighting battles in their mind, struggling to find ways to escape from their current circumstances. Us being so nosy and recklessly throwing comments without any solid solution will do them no good. It will just create more burden to their mind.
Whenever people starts to criticize me, I actually wait and anticipate for their next sentences, hoping they continue with some ideas, even the silly but rationale one, to make me stop trying hard. However, most of the times they just stop. Leaving me questioning myself, questioning my effort, questioning everything... and it could kill the fire and confidence that I previously had.
So I guess, unless we have better alternative that might help others to stop 'trying too hard', or some constructive critiques with solid reasoning and feedback, or at the very least some points of discussion worth to mention, I think it is much wiser to just keep the urge to preach to ourself.
Because we know people are already trying hard. You're already trying super hard. I'm also already trying so hard.
Let's not make it any harder for everyone 😉
